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In Her Shoes
TWSC Submission: Healing from Extreme Betrayal
Everything changed when I was about 11 years old. My parents began having conflict and my father ended up moving out of our home, leaving my mother to take care of seven children single-handedly. The eldest was 13 and the youngest was still breastfeeding. I was the third eldest. My dad sold the house we were living in and left us all quite desperate.
In her Shoes: Hagar and the Spring - Pt.1
Hagar was a foreigner and a slave. As Sarah’s maidservant, she had one job – to attend to Sarah. Biblical scholars believe Hagar was one of the servants given to Abraham in Egypt when Pharaoh took Sarah for himself (Genesis 12:16).
TWSC Submission: Starting Over as a Single Mother of 5
I am a mother of five. I was married very young and had my firstborn a few days before my 18th birthday.
TWSC Submission: Severe Trauma Triggered My Fibromyalgia
Growing up, I have experienced a tremendous amount of trauma, from physical, emotional and even sexual trauma. I come from a broken family. My parents divorced when I was young. During their marriage, there was constant fighting between them, and it got physical at times. Their divorce was inevitable, and so my mother, brother and I moved into a flat.
Getting to Know Radio Personality & Model Fikile Cele
Fikile Cele, who we did a story on a couple weeks ago, is taking action to help people impacted by the current unrest in South Africa. When I first interviewed Fikile for her story, I could sense her deep passion for people and her desire to make the world a better place. That wasn’t just talk; she is founding an NGO to provide aid to people who need it the most in South Africa
TWSC Submission: Starting Over
Sophie Atieno Odumu is a mother of four kids, a teacher and a women and children’s rights activist. She opened up to TWSC Contributor Gladwell Wachira about what drives her to fight to educate women and children about their rights.
TWSC Submission: My Greatest Battle Outside the Courtroom – Surviving Financial Abuse from my Child’s Father
I'm a mother of one and a lawyer. Since high school, I have been passionate about the law and advocating for people. I enjoy it now, every day. My story is one of mental and financial abuse. Even though I am a shark in the courtroom, I was manipulated by a man I once loved and almost lost my dream. My experience is proof that abuse can happen to anyone. This is my story.
TWSC Submission: Pregnant and Alone - How I Found Love After Being Rejected by my Family & Child's Father
My name is Portia* and I am 38 years old. I come from Gokwe, Zimbabwe. Growing up, I have faced quite a number of challenges, one of which was falling pregnant at a young age of 22 out of wedlock. I was childish at the time because when I was around five months pregnant, my aunt, who I was staying with at the time, is the one who noticed that I was pregnant even though I had tr
A Single Mother's Experience Raising Two Autistic Children
The following story is about 41-year-old Samira Njoki from Kenya. Samira is mother to two autistic boys and has been single-handedly taking care of them for five years after her husband turned his back on them.
TWSC Submission: When My Childhood Ended
Merida Ohame was forced to undergo female genital mutilation (FGM), and then, soon after, forced to marry a total stranger. Today, at 62, she has vowed it fight for the rights of women and the girl child. She believes that FGM has damaging effects on girls and lowers a women self-esteem, and has worked to help eradicate this practice for over 30 years. This is her story.
Broken but Beautiful: Don’t Give up on Healing, Help Will Come - Pt. 1
Growing up, I preferred being in two spaces: anywhere with my brothers or in school, particularly in class with my classmates because it felt safe. One afternoon we were called out to go for a girls-only session. I was eleven then and this was my first time attending such a session. I’m grateful we had the privilege of having talks on puberty, hygiene and how to relate with oth
In Her Shoes: Braving Through Bipolar Disorder
I have bipolar II and these are all examples of a type of psychosis I have experienced. Delusions and hallucinations are forms of psychosis that people with bipolar disorder may suffer from during full-blown manic episodes.
TWSC Submission: I was Lured into a Marriage Under False Pretense
My relationship with my ex-husband was my second relationship. I dated him for four years with no red flag until I got pregnant. He had a wife in the rural areas and his family was very secretive about it. When I eloped to his house, we had to have a family meeting with family members. The meeting took three hours to start, but everyone was around. People were very hesitant to
Embracing my Journey as an Endo Warrior
I have struggled with excruciating menstrual periods since I was a teenager. It’s the kind of pain that pain medications don’t even begin to soothe. I have also spent the last eight years consulting numerous doctors because of my unexplained infertility. I did not realize that the two were related and that so many women are affected like me.
From Motherless to Mother to 68 Homeless Children in Kenya
Esther Kanyutu, a mother of three kids, knew that God had a purpose for her in life. Today, she is a mother of 68 young girls and boys who were left homeless after the 2007 Kenya post-election violence. It all began when a police vehicle dropped those vulnerable kids in front of her house. She prayed to God to give her the strength to provide for and protect them. She knelt dow
Speak Out with Caroline...Unscripted
My relationship with my dad was fantastic and continues to be to this day. My mother and I, though, were not ‘bosom buddies.’ For years on end, I always felt that she was too harsh, too critical of me. I feel she rejected me. My self-esteem was at an all-time low in my childhood. This followed me into the crucial teen years. The fact that I could not get any positive vibes or c
TWSC Series: Navigating Through Pain - Rosa’s Healing Journey
Pain and death are a part of life; to reject them is to reject life itself. Experiencing loss can be devastating, but experiencing triple loss can be catastrophic. Everything seems to have fallen apart. Having experienced different versions of intense loss led to my grieving.
TWSC Submission: Grieving the Loss of My Unborn Child and Uterus
My name is Catherine* and I am 42 years old and an animal health assistant by profession. I was born in a family of four siblings and the only girl. In 2010, late December, I was diagnosed as diabetic. I later found out that I was born diabetic but didn't know until I was in my 30's. Shortly after, I got pregnant after hooking up with a guy only to realize later that he had a d
TWSC Submission: The Day I Lost My Baby and My Uterus
Her childhood was a complicated one. Raised in a polygamous family, Rosa’s father worked in the city while her biological mother lived in the village. Rosa lived in the city with her father and stepmother because she had an eye problem that required frequent treatment at a hospital.
TWSC Submission: Healing from devastating pregnancy loss
On the 18th of February 2019, I told the midwife that there was no movement in my womb. She asked me to rush to the hospital. When I arrived, I was asked to take an ultra-scan. It was then that it was confirmed that the baby was no longer alive. I was admitted immediately and induced. I was 34 weeks pregnant.
TWSC Submission: When Daddy Left
My father, I still remember his face because of the photos they have shown me. He disappeared when I was six years old. I was the only child from my father but my mother had other children. By the time she met my father, she had [five] children. She eventually had 10 children and I was the sixth one. There was no relationship at all with my siblings because they had different f
TWSC Submission: My HIV Status Does Not Define Me
It is not clear how I contracted the sickness because my boyfriend at the time [was] negative. But looking back, I think I might have gotten it from a razor cut [from a blade] that was used to cut my mom's sister who was already bedridden with AIDS.
TWSC Submission: How my Marriage and Womb were Restored
Those are the words shared by Vimbai Ncube who was born and raised in Bulawayo, Zimbabwe, as the youngest of four children. Because she was born during the wartime in 1973, the family had to relocate from Entumbane to Queens Park where her father worked as a cook for a white family. Entumbane had become the epicentre of the Bulawayo battle named Gukurahundi.
TWSC Submission: How I Learned to Value Myself After Many Years of Bad Relationships
I come from a family of nine children. My mother lost one, so we are now eight. As a teenager, we were living in a one-bedroom apartment and I didn't find the place comfortable. I had a hatred for my dad. I didn't like the fact that he would drink, come home very late and wouldn't pay attention to us, his kids. I would see other children growing up with proper care from their f
TWSC Submission: When Mama Died
While the loss of a mother is devastating at any age, one of our readers reached out to us to share her story about losing her mother at the age of eight and the series of events that transpired after. She asked for her story to be published anonymously. This is her story:
TWSC Submission: Losing my Sister
Sisterly bonds are one of the most powerful bonds. What happens when one loses a sister, especially one that had taken up the role of both mother and breadwinner?
Danai Ruze: From Child Bride to Young Woman Striving for Empowerment
Danai Ruze is the only daughter in a family of three in a small town in Zimbabwe called Murehwa, which is 75 kilometers northeast from the capital, Harare. During Form 3 (Grade 11), she fell pregnant by a boy she had madly fallen in love with.
TWSC Submission: Surviving the Loss of my Baby
My name is Thobekile Moyo. I grew up in Gwanda but later relocated to Harare where l finished my education at Waddilove School. I am 43 and currently have three kids aged 20,12 and 15 months old. Although it is difficult to talk about, l will share my story just to help someone out there.
How I Found My Purpose: My Unplanned Pregnancy, Job Loss and Pursuit of my Passion
Cynthia studied psychology and HR at Monash in South Africa thinking it would land her in a profession that helped people with their emotional issues. That was what she really loved doing. Her parents advised her to do HR as a backup because they didn’t see a real earning future in psychology.
Founder of DigitalAgeConversations Shares How a Closed Door Expanded Her Sphere of Influence
A few years ago, I was at the peak of my career in the broadcasting sector as Legal and Corporate Services Director of the Broadcasting Regulator in my country. At the time, I did not realize the power and potential that was in me until I was thrown out of my comfort zone of holding my breath, waiting for someone to give me permission to be the best version of myself. When my c
TWSC Submission: How Discrimination Nearly Derailed My Success
I started work as a copy typist at the University of Zimbabwe and was promoted to the post of secretary in the public law department in 1990. I was then further promoted in 1995 to the post of senior secretary at the University of Zimbabwe Centre for Distance Education, Bulawayo region, which later became Zimbabwe Open University in 1999.
I Survived
Sean Kingston in his song “Beautiful Girls” sang a line, “all these beautiful girls, they only wanna do you dirt; they'll have you suicidal, suicidal when they say it’s over....” Adults and kids sang along, oblivious to what they were singing, myself included. It is only when it hit closer to home than l could ever imagine that l understood what it truly meant to be suicidal.
TWSC Submission: How the Illness and Death of My Husband Changed My Whole World
Widowhood is a painful and traumatizing experience. The death of a spouse causes mental anguish that only time can heal. Haruchemwi Nhengu narrated to The Weight She Carries how she was abandoned before and after the death of her husband by her in-laws. What follows is her account of what happened:
How This Single Mom of Two Rewrote Her Story
Child-headed families have become the norm over the years due to various circumstances – mostly very painful ones. Christine* narrated to The Weight She Carries how she experienced such an ordeal first-hand and came out on the other side with her first degree in hand.
Sharai Makota Shares How She is Rebuilding Her Life After Tragedy
Going from being an able-bodied teacher to being paralyzed is not easy, especially when your partner who vowed to be with you through thick and thin files for divorce. The following story is about 57-year-old Sharai Makota who was involved in an accident that changed her whole life and how she managed to get back on her feet. This is her story:
How I Started Over as a Widow After Losing Everything to my In-Laws
Esther Wanjiku Kabeni was wife to a corporal in the Kenya Defence Forces (KDF) until an unfortunate event in 2016. Not only did she lose her husband, his family was intent on stripping her of everything the couple owned, claiming all their household items belonged to their son. This is her story:
It Didn't Work Out
The keys are still where I left them. Everything is quiet here. There is no life, save for nature. The house which was supposed to be filled with laughter is empty. My laughter, our laughter. It reminds me of the past. A past which I wish I could change and relive.
TWSC Submission: Traumatized By My Own Family
My name is Flora Nkatha Mugao. I was born and raised in Tharaka, Kenya. I attended Gekondi Primary School. I was a bubbly kid and had a normal childhood in a closely-knit family. My parents were both teachers. My mum taught in a primary school while my dad taught in a high school. We had neither too much nor too little. One thing that my mother always said whenever we lacked fo
Pregnant and Rejected: Lessons Learned Through Disappointment and Heartbreak
Lilian Choruwa is a bubbly mother of two and a grandmother of one. Life is good now, but when she was 20, she found herself pregnant and alone, with no one to turn to.
A Second Chance
Fortunate Moyo claims her first husband abused her emotionally, financially and physically during the course of their 3-year marriage.
Learning to Love My Mother-in-law Despite Her Mistreatment
Growing up, my worst fear was not getting along with my mother-in-law when I got married because I had heard a lot of stories about mothers and daughters-in-law not getting along with each other. I didn’t get it though. I thought it was every mothers’ dream to have her son married and wean him off so he can grow and have his own family. I find out different.
TWSC Submission: Battle After Battle
I am 34 years old and was born into a polygamist family of 24 children from five mothers. Due to our Tugen in Kalenjin culture, our parents refused to take us girls to school, and we had to look after goats and cows while our father looked for old men to marry us.
TWSC Submission: How Depression Almost Killed me
Depression has left my kids traumatized, my relationships with my colleagues ruined and my health in a fragile state. It could never had been this serious had I admitted I had a problem and sought help when I had the chance. Prevention is much better than cure; it’s unfortunate I am only realizing it now.
TWSC Submission: Finding True Love After Vowing to Stay Single
I was born into a polygamist family. We were 16 children born to two mothers and my parents struggled to provide for us because we were so many.
TWSC Submission: My Life as a Co-wife
I was raised in a polygamist family. When I was two years old, my mother remarried a man who was a polygamist. The reason why my mother remarried was because her former husband’s relatives wanted to kill her. They were mad because the dowry which my father used to pay for my mother was not his. It was supposed to be used for another woman. So, in the new home, I got mistreated
TWSC Submission: Getting Back on my Feet After Losing Almost All my Relatives
I was born and raised upcountry. Growing up as a normal child, I found myself living with my maternal grandparents. I grew up with my younger brother whom we were so close in terms of age. I grew knowing my name as Grace, but once in a while, I would go out to the market and people would call me a different name. I was young and didn't understand until I was much older.
TWSC Submission: Making It Out Of The Dark Tunnel
I waited almost 28 years to have my first child. I was not in a rush, in fact, I wanted to get married first. I told myself I wanted my relationship to be like my parents. They are my role models. They don't hold grudges against each other and taught us, their children, the principles of life. I wanted my marriage to work just like theirs, but it was not to be.
Words Hurt
School was a no-go area, enemy territory in fact. Just the thought of going to school made her flinch and break out in a sweat. This is a story of friends becoming enemies, of trust betrayed. Yeah, that sort of thing.
TWSC Submission: Learning to Forgive my Parents
I am a 26-year-old teacher and first born raised by a single mother. Well, I didn’t really grow up with my mother. I pretty much have been a nomad all my life, moving from one place/relative/friend to another.
Raised by an Abuser – How I Survived Extreme Abuse at the Hands of My Stepmother
I grew up with a stepmother, my dad and siblings both older and younger. The house was never short of people, which was really great. My older sisters would bake cakes and cupcakes as well as sew. Being in a house full of people was wonderful for me.
TWSC Submission: The Story of a Traumatized Woman
When I look back, I cannot say I should have known better. I knew better but I was too blinded by love to face reality. I am now left with a limping leg and scars all over my once beautiful body.
TWSC Submission: My Boss' Wife
"I was working for a private publishing company as a graphic designer and this made me to work closely with my boss, who was too nice to me. He allowed me to work through my pregnancy till the baby was born, and he called me back after the baby was born to work and I resumed.
TWSC Submission: 25 Years Later...
Twenty-five years later I have been blessed with a family – three kids and a loving husband, but I still can’t get the grave mistake I made out of my head.
Lessons From the Death of a Loved One
Three months ago, my aunt passed away unexpectedly. It has been a difficult time for me and it is still hard for me to accept or understand why she was taken from us. Over the past three months, I have learnt several things which I thought would be worth sharing with you.
TWSC Submission: My Ruined Past
The following personal story was narrated to The Weight She Carries contributor Ivy Chibanda: I am not proud of my past, but when I look at young girls today, my wish for them is that they don’t repeat the same mistakes I made. If I could change my past, I would, but I can’t. All I can do is work on my future. During my teenage years, I became aware of my beauty. I grew into a
In Her Shoes: It Wasn’t Worth It
Ten years later, she looks back and thinks again…was it worth it? She retraces her steps and realizes that she was more in love with her boyfriend than he was with her, but she didn’t know that then. He seemed earnest when he told her she would be the best mother for his future children. She was 20 then. Deep down, she didn’t want to get married so young, but he was older and a
In Her Shoes: The Esther Factor
Life had been tough. Not only had she lost both parents, but she was a foreigner living in exile. Thank God for Cousin Mordecai who had taken her in and raised her as his own. He had taught her well and protected her from unsolicited attention her beauty often drew. But cousin Mordecai couldn’t hide her from scouts sent from the palace in search of the most beautiful women in t